Jump to content
Rom

The POETS corner: Post only in style or be hoovered

Recommended Posts

This thread for BMs to express themselves in a more fun, intense way than when they routinely post on our Board.  About anything you want.  Doesn't have to rhyme.  I'll start with something that is on all our minds:

That's great, it starts with a headache
coughs and sneezes, and no more dames
And Jimbo Scott is not around

Eye of a Hurry Dude! listen to yourself churn
Virus serves its own needs,
Don't care the farang needs
Pay it up a notch, speed it up, grunt, no strength
The barfine starts to clatter
With a fear of: white, down, white
Wire in a fire, represent the high stake games
For a sissy boy for hire and a combat site
Left me on an ST, wasn't cuming in the distance
With the masks blocking down your throat

Team by team, bar owners baffled, trumped, tethered, cropped
Look the empty volleyball pool, fine, then
Uh oh, underflow, depopulation, no baht bus
But it'll do, save yourself, serve yourself
Issan peasant serves its own needs, listen to your pocket bleed
Tell me with the Rapture in the repatriation flight, right
You vitriolic, patriotic, slam fight, BM white
Feeling pretty sided

It's the end of the world as we know it
It's the end of the world as we know it (time I had some time alone)
It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel pain.

Edited by Rom
The idea for this thread came from something similar BM bbg posted at the Katty Club
  • Like 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

you asked for it! Romehian Rhapsody... Or Rom's worst nightmare....:biggrin: i hope this isn't prophetic by the way.......

 

Am I in TJs? Am I in Fantasy? Up on The Roof, no Tranny can I see,

I’m not in La Bamba, it’s not the place for me,

can’t get no honey, I got no money,

because it’s easy come, easy go, now I’m a little low.

Silicone or hormone, doesn’t really matter, to me. 

 

BM’s, I’ve just had a dream,

put my phone against my head.

It was lily and she said,

“Rom, my cock has gone.

Now I’ve just thrown it away.

 

Rom ooh--oooh 

You might wonder what,

made me go post-op

Cocks gone! Cocks gone!

Are all your dreams in tatters?

 

Too late Rom, my dick has gone

chills you to the soul,

now I’ve got another hole.

Goodbye nasty man thing, it had to go,

I had to get the chop and face the truth.

 

Rom.. Oooh…Oooh

I didn’t want a dong

Sometimes wish I’d never had one at all.”

 

I see a little Taxidermist

 Lily, Lily, send your cock to me

Pre-op to Post-op, to her it is enlightening

Taxidermy! Taxidermy! Taxidermy! Silicone! Now she can’t top-o

“I’m just a poor girl, I can still be bottom”,

[she’s just a poor girl, she can still be bottom]

and can do a blow job, satisfactorily.

Blow job blow job! You can have a blow job!

Blow job! But you can’t give a Blow job to me”

 It’s a farce, but she can have it in her arse

It’s a farce but she can have it in her arse

[ Back or front] get it stuffed!

[Back or front] get it stuffed!

Never, never, never, cannot gobble lily’s dick no more… Ah!

No no no no no no no no

 

Oh Lily dear, Lily dear, get it stuffed and send your cock to me,

I will keep it on my shelf, for me, for me, for me!

 

So now you’re a woman

I think I might die

Oh Lily, why’d you do this to me Lily?

I don’t like post-op,

but think I’ll have to try.

Ooh yeah

Ooh yeah.

  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wrote this about Poppy 7 years ago. The sensation at Sensations Bar, back in the day.

 

I'll let her stroke my puppy if she says that I'm her pappy
I must be very fast because she's cute and barfines snappy
and if she lets me buy her drink I'll be a happy chappie
and if she says she'll go with me she'll make her pappy happy


I sit and drink Sensations Bar but there's no sign of Poppy
I came for her and no-one else I can't accept a copy
I've sat too long my boner's gone it's flacid and it's floppy
I'm old and fat I'm going home the girls say that I'm sloppy


it's raining now I'm walking back I'm damp and feeling drippy
the road is wet I nearly fell it's dangerous and slippy
then on a bike I see her pass so confident and nippy
she smiled at me it made my day rain glinted off her lippy


I turned around I'm going back to get my taste of honey
the girls see me all soaking wet and laugh and think it's funny
but Poppy comes and sits with me and helps me spend my money
so never mind it's raining because Poppy makes it sunny

:Monkey:

  • Like 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh dear......

Just read PDoggs post with the lyrics of Dylans latest song. He's got nothing on you guys.:biggrin:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There was a BM called Fuckem

Who returned to the place to fuck them

Try as he might, he had trouble alright

Cause he could couldn't find any he could fuck for the night.

He tried his usual haunts, but what he saw were just locked doors

No open doors when looking for whores

He thought, what can I do, I am in a stew

Kept looking but found only closed doors

Aha he thought. TF to the rescue

That would sort out the chaf from the straw

What else could he do?.

So out came the phone and off went the messages to those he had met before

After a minute or two came back the replies

To appear before his very eyes

Now to say they were desperate was no exageration

They kept messaging him to his own consternation

How can he respond to those pleas for money

When all they say is money, please send some money.

He thinks for awhile and works out his prospects

Is it big tits or big dicks

Thinks some more and makes some picks

Maybe more than one, could be twice as much fun

Will it be Teya and Sunny

Or Jenny and Ammy

No on second thoughts maybe Polla and Sandy

Contemplates a sore bum in the morning

But would rather be more comfortable on the morrows dawning

As he wanders around with his eyes on the ground

A voice sounds

Hey Mister, handsome man, I can be yours for the night for just 1000

He looks up and sees a vision

So back to his room to get rid of his frustration

And thanks the lord for his early indecision

His vision, a tall willowy thing

Has him in stitches as she drops her britches

Out springs this donga

Thick as a brick and man was is it longer

Than any he had seen before

Off came the top and out flopped her tits

Much more than a mouthful but who gives a shit

She fell on the bed with her cock pointing skywards

He jumped on top and said fuck me backwards

After a few minutes pumping he was jumping

Up, to continue the action

Rolled her over and licked her ass

Then gave her his cock after she said is that what you call a pass

Within a short time he came to shooting his load 

Rolled her back over and said

This is for you before you hit the road

With duties done and him having such fun

He pulled out his wallet to give her the money and she said

Dont bother, I will call you my hun

I will stay with you forever and a day

Or until this virus thing has been put away

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

O cat...! O Rabbit...! Cat...! Rabbit...! Cat...! I have a carrot to stick up you Rabbit...! You do that and I turn you into a postie Cat...! Tsk! Tsk!

 

The end. You're welcome :yahoo:

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks gentlemen,  Loved bbg's Rohemian Rhapsody and was much impressed with DC's and Woodie's actual poetry (as opposed to song spoofing) namely as regards Poppy who was my diva obsession 8 years ago, same-same and as short-lived as Lily was last year.  I remember posting peeps of Poppy at PY and nearly being crucified for it by the Sensations homies and being implored to remove them by a BM so I did.  I might repost them one of these days here at the Romscars Club.   Does anyone know whatever happened to Poppy?  Is she OK?

Now:  since the thread rule is to do poetry or be hoovered, here is one dedicated to the BM right above, who seems to like them short and to-the-point:

Are you ready, BMs?
I said, are you ready?

Who lives in a pineapple down under the E ?                          (E = Equator)
JimmyKnob CargoPants
Know-all and Aussie and farang is he
JimmyKnob CargoPants

If drivel nonsense be something you wish
JimmyKnob CargoPants
Then drop on the Board and post like a modish
JimmyKnob CargoPants

JimmyKnob CargoPants
JimmyKnob CargoPants
JimmyKnob CargoPants
JimmyKnob CargoPants

Edited by Rom
I'm not a native English speaker and hope "knob" is taken in jest to rhyme like "Bob."
  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Come now gentlemen,

Let’s have no more argue-ing.

No more Rom-ing and Cargo-ing.

No more Covid and false statistics

Thank god for Strocube and realistics.

Forget the gloom and smell the blossom,

In a year Covid will be forgotten.

Stop the guesswork, hit and missing,

Into the wind you’re surely pissing.

Scared of dying is the impression giving,

When you’re really scared of living.

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Does it have to be in English ? Holy sh... that'll be too hard for me.  OK, I cheated a little bit, I hope it's not too bad though. 

 

I dreamt a trip… in Bay of Maya

Saw wonders … in Ayutthaya

Lost my soul … around Pattaya

Crazy old Siam, crazy old Siam

 

Clouds are drifting across the soi

Night is full … of pretty katoeys

Spring’s a fuck with a ladyboy

Dirty old LOS, dirty old LOS

 

Found my soulmate … under the full moon

Kissed my gurl … in soi Chaiyapoon

Fucked my love , in a short time room

Gloomy Thailand, gloomy Thailand

 

Went all the way, up to Lamphum

Left my love, next to Chaiyaphum

Then departed , from Suvarnabhum

Bye bye Thailand, bye bye Thailand

 

If it's  worth a little something, you can read it with the music of the Pogues.

 

 

 

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This an ode to my relationship with a LB.

Many moons ago I visited a bar

It was one I had heard of from afar

Run by two, an Em and a Jim

After plucking up courage I made it there

Upon entering I was set upon by a likely pair

One was Kimmy the other Sophia

After a drink or two it was Kimmy who said lets not wait here

Upon paying the fine we made it out of there

Up the hill towards Soi 26

With Kimmy staggering from too many drinks

I gave her a hand but thinking this sort of thing stinks

Made it to the room, where she flopped on the bed

Me thinks we go back to the bar I said

Off we waddled back to the bar where I returned the goods to boss lady Em

I explained what had happened and she said would I like to swap them

As it so happened I said yes

I would like to have sweet Sophia I must confess

So up the hill again to soi 26

But with me thinking oh for some success

Into the room we went and into the shower

Back onto the bed and holy cow did she have some power

It was a night to remember

With me getting a bloody knee trembler

In the morning when it came time to part

I said to her this is only the start

And it proved to be one of those flings

Which went on to greater things

Over the months I made trips back to Pattaya

And what was once a chance meeting 

Grew to be far from fleeting

Been to there and back and at times was a struggle

But never could I forget that first cuddle

There was a time some months ago

When I thought shall I let her go

And I did but only to weaken

and beg to be forgiven

WE are now strong

but who knows for how long

We are planning our future for when Covid departs

And for the moment baring our hearts

She in her village and me in my home incomplete

Who knows how long til she says come here my sweet

I have had a few pairings with LB's

But most of them I regarded as toys

With Sophia I have lent her my heart

Just hope it is only the start

We will go on as long as we can

Just hoping this covid is not a lifelong ban

We chat on the phone when we are feeling alone

But it is not the same as lying in bed and feeling her bone

What we want is to be together once more

For our bodies to once again playfully explore.

Come on you scientists come on you politicians

Lets beat this thing once and for all

Maybe all it takes is a rallying call

There is a seat in a jet waiting to fly

Please make it happen before I die

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Air travel.

As we wait for our departure

The governments discuss and argue

When shall we let the serfs depart

As we sit here with a broken heart

The planes are idle too much we say

Lets get them up, up and away

While heartfelt pleas are expressed on bended knees

Those in power say you have only buckley's

So as we count the days while being away

We wonder, are their hearts being lead astray

On and on the days drag by

And nobody knows when we will fly

With airlines folding all around

As to when we fly the theories abound

It will make no difference to whom I send my plea

But please for everyones sake just set us free

On and on the pundits pontificate

You will be flying soon they say but dont give us a date

Will it be August or November who can say for certain

Please god make it soon before they pull down the curtain

My sexual life is not never ending

So please let me fly I am over pretending

Watching porn is ok for awhile

But not the same as seeing my girl smile

Nothing compares to a rumble in the sheets

Especially when she has her cock in your cheeks

I can only dream of the time when she walks into the room 

And surrounds me with her fragrant perfume

In the meantime life goes on and all we hear are some truths and some lies

Get those fucking planes flying through those cloudy skies

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

to the tune of 'Joey'

 

Born somewhere in London, when his mum gave him a hug

When he opened up his eyes, to the sight of a doodlebug

Things were tough in ’18 or the year of who knows when,

When they asked him why, it had to be that way. ” well ” he said,

 ”no Pattaya Mail then”.

 

One day he found a car boot sale* and he had 10 shillings** spare,

With it bought himself a camera and computer there.

He loved those things for ever but now they’ve both gone rotten,

“Not to worry” said he “I’ve certainly still got ’em”

 

      Quietguy…Quietguy..  

   software expert, cameraman-extraordinaire

   Quietguy… Quiet guy…

    Whatever really happened to your hair.…

 

There was talk that he hit his head, when he fell down and it hurt,

whilst trying to take a photo, way up Sunny’s skirt.

He had come to Thailand looking for some sin,

 When Sunny took one look, and took him under her wing

listen Grunt” she said to me ”keep it quiet please for certain

I’ll tell you now that his shutter button just ain’t working,

And his zoom, just don’t zoom no more.

So what you think? Viagra in his drink may do the job?

That’s what I’m here for”

 

   Quietguy…Quietguy…

software expert, cameraman - extraordinaire

Quietguy… Quietguy…

Whatever really happened to your hair.…

 

There was talk that one day, he subscribed - to the Pattaya Mail.

If Rom does an award for reporter of the year

’well I guess, QG just can’t fail.

No abomination should prevent the nomination of our very own news sensation.

In his room you see, waiting for a tesco’s delivery.

Hazmat suit tightly bound and Molotov cocktails all around,

When flights resume he will be found sitting on his favourite chair In the Katty bar, but still no hair,

with a more useful camera though

One that actually can take a photo.

 

Quietguy…Quietguy…

software expert, cameraman - extraordinaire

Quietguy… Quiet guy,

Whatever really happened to your hair.…

 

 

The Kittens were trembling when they heard QG explain..

i will count to three via one and two, then I’ll take a snap of you”

Said Teya “Jeez, don’t do it please”

As I heard Sunny mutter “thank god his fingers on the lens

and not the shutter”

“One, two, three give a big smile…oops the buttons stuck, this may take a while"

Said Quiet guy with some alacrity

"I’ve had this since ’63- bought with Green Shield stamps you see.

But don’t worry Sunny, soon I’ll grab ya

If you have some more Kamagra.”

 

Quietguy…Quietguy…

software expert, cameraman - extraordinaire

Quietguy… Quiet guy,

Whatever really happened to your hair.…

 

 

Thanks to Jacques Levy and Bob Dylan for “Joey’  although I’m sure they would have called it “Quietguy” if they had known him.

*swap-meet

** about 40 baht i think.

 

 

  • Like 3
  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The Rime of the Ancient Jomtiener

(With apologies to Samuel Taylor Coleridge)

 

It is an ancient Jomtiener,

And he stoppeth one in three,

'By thy long grey hair and drooping fag,

Now wherefore stop'st thou me?' 

 

Katty Bar's doors are opened wide,

I want to enter in,

The girls are fine, and so's the wine,

May'st hear the merry din.

 

He holds him with his skinny hand,

'There was a bike' , quote he,

'Hold off! Unhand me, grey-hair loon!'

Eft soons his  hand dropt  he.

 

I fear thee ancient Jomtiener,

I fear the fag you hold,

I fear its' poison laden smoke,

He took a drag, his eyes did roll.

 

He holds him with his glittering eye -

The visitor stood still.

And listens like a three years' child,

The Jomtiener hath his will.

 

The visitor stood on the soi.

He cannot choose but hear;

And thus spake on that ancient man,

The bright-eyed Jomtieneer.

 

'The bike from far away was brought,

I rode it down Beach Road,

But my eyes were on a girl in  slitted shorts,

I forgot my safety mode.'

 

'The front wheel did lock and slip,

O'er the handlebars I flew,

I lost my balance and my grip,

I even lost my shoe'.

 

'Where's my shoe, where's my shoe?!

Was all that I could utter,

But fortunately a passing Canada Man,

Found it lying in the gutter.'

 

I fear thee, ancient Jomtiener!

I fear thy skinny hand!

And thou art long, and lank, and brown,

as is the Jomtien sand.

 

I fear thee and thy smouldering fag.

And thy skinny hand, so brown -

'Fear not, fear not, thou quiet man!

This body broke not down.'

 

'My mishap and my missing shoe,

Did aught but the words foretell,

Of a fair maiden's visit to Katty Bar,

Whose name was Annabel.'  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  • Like 2
  • Haha 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

             The Ballad of QG, Kimmie, Emmy, and a Car.

[Journey through a hard night]

 

 

  Down down, into the footwell of the car he dropped

taking kimmie with him too,

Down down, of his own volition,

on whatever private mission.

  Over the bump of a pothole they went,

He yelped ‘ Emmy, my dicks stuck in the air vent!

Said Emmy “QG and Kimmy what are you doing?

 my car you will surely ruin!”

“Ignore him” cried Grunt from the seat in the back

For he is just being silly,

I could do without all this messing about,

 I should have stayed, in TJs... with my true love Lily.”

 

  “Throw him out!” said Quinn [I think it was him]

But could have been Kevin I really don’t know now

Memory nowadays being somewhat uncertain,

“Oh don’t you know” [continued Quinn] we don’t really need this show,

‘tween front and back should be a curtain.”

Emmy said ‘Grunt.. I have to do something perverse, for bad or worse, 

change gear from first to reverse

But QG he’s impaled deep upon the stick,

please advise me what to do quick "

 

  “Well" i replied” “I’ll tell to you the truth , but quickly now don’t hesitate,

but first open the sun roof before it gets too late.”

So Emmy changed from first to reverse and through the roof Quietguy flew

Screaming and snarling, cursing and a-yelling, yee-haw! oh, what a to-do!

Followed fast by Kimmie who was still attached, er... willy-nilly

Wishing she was back in TJs with BB, PD, bella and Lily.

 

  So, talking to Emmy a day or two after

Rolling up with tears of laughter

Said she with all the English that she could muster

QG once told me that his heritage is Indian" she said without fluster,

and Sunny told me of his little big horn, or something along those lines

so doesn’t that mean that his ancestor’s hunted buffaloes

and then they killed Custer?

What tribe is he pray tell me Grunt,  Sioux, Comanche or Arapaho?”

“well Emmy I replied “ he’s certainly Sue in some clubs in Soho.

Where he confesses that he wears nice dresses, a bra and a girdle

But If he’s ever arrested he’ll jump across that hurdle.

Though he’ll have difficulty explaining to his friend lola

When she sees, the scar on his arse shaped like a gear shift

From a Honda, Chevrolet , Ford or Suzuki Swift.”

 

Well, the moral of this poem, the moral of this song

Is simple don’t be where you don’t belong

So Sunny and teya if you are listening,

and he invites you into the front of a car with him

Jump into the back seat, and lock the doors if you are able.

This story is no fable.

Of Kimmie, no more has ever been seen

Thanks to counceling her nightmare is perhaps just a dream.

Quinn or Kevin and grunt now recovered, we are hoping!

But Emmy She is still- only just coping,

When she turns on the air-con in her car,

strange fluid is ejected somehow …

but I guess we’ll finish this now.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 hours ago, blind boy grunt said:

The Ballad of QG, Kimmie, Emmy, and a Car.

Emmy said ‘Grunt.. I have to do something perverse, for bad or worse, 

change gear from first to reverse

But QG he’s impaled deep upon the stick,

please advise me what to do quick "

 

  “Well" i replied” “I’ll tell to you the truth , but quickly now don’t hesitate,

but first open the sun roof before it gets too late.”

So Emmy changed from first to reverse and through the roof Quietguy flew

Screaming and snarling, cursing and a-yelling, yee-haw! oh, what a to-do!

:shok: :crazy:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 5/24/2020 at 10:54 AM, Quietguy said:

The Rime of the Ancient Jomtiener

(With apologies to Samuel Taylor Coleridge)

 

It is an ancient Jomtiener,

And he stoppeth one in three,

'By thy long grey hair and drooping fag,

Now wherefore stop'st thou me?' 

 

Katty Bar's doors are opened wide,

I want to enter in,

The girls are fine, and so's the wine,

May'st hear the merry din.

 

He holds him with his skinny hand,

'There was a bike' , quote he,

'Hold off! Unhand me, grey-hair loon!'

Eft soons his  hand dropt  he.

 

I fear thee ancient Jomtiener,

I fear the fag you hold,

I fear its' poison laden smoke,

He took a drag, his eyes did roll.

 

He holds him with his glittering eye -

The visitor stood still.

And listens like a three years' child,

The Jomtiener hath his will.

 

The visitor stood on the soi.

He cannot choose but hear;

And thus spake on that ancient man,

The bright-eyed Jomtieneer.

 

'The bike from far away was brought,

I rode it down Beach Road,

But my eyes were on a girl in  slitted shorts,

I forgot my safety mode.'

 

'The front wheel did lock and slip,

O'er the handlebars I flew,

I lost my balance and my grip,

I even lost my shoe'.

 

'Where's my shoe, where's my shoe?!

Was all that I could utter,

But fortunately a passing Canada Man,

Found it lying in the gutter.'

 

I fear thee, ancient Jomtiener!

I fear thy skinny hand!

And thou art long, and lank, and brown,

as is the Jomtien sand.

 

I fear thee and thy smouldering fag.

And thy skinny hand, so brown -

'Fear not, fear not, thou quiet man!

This body broke not down.'

 

'My mishap and my missing shoe,

Did aught but the words foretell,

Of a fair maiden's visit to Katty Bar,

Whose name was Annabel.'  

 

Part II

'Her lips were red, her looks were free,

Her locks were yellow as gold;

Her skin were white as ice,

Her fragrance lustily nice,

She thickened my manly pole.'

 

'Annabel paced into the bar,

White as snow is she.

Wai-ing their heads as she came in,

the ladyboys of Katty.'

 

The visitor he beat his breast,

Yet cannot choose but hear;

And thus spake on that ancient man,

The bright-eyed Jomtieneer.

 

'Annabel sat outside astride a bike,

leaving a damp stain beneath her,

Which excited this ancient man,

And I sniffed at that reminder.'

 

''Annabel moved her legs apart,

and inserted a bottle of Singha.

When she put it down again,

To seize it I did not linger'.

 

'Then Annabel removed a shoe,

And threw it through the air.

It landed somewhere on the roof,

And still remaineth there.'

 

God save thee, ancient Jomtiener,

From the fantasies that plague thy mind.

I climbed up upon that roof to see

if that footwear I could find.

 

And now that ancient Jomtiener,

Would that maiden's sandal get.

He had the bike seat and the bottle.

He now had the full Annabel set.

 

The Jomtiener, whose eye is bright,

Whose hair with age is hoar,

Is happy: And now the quiet man

Can enter Katty Bar's door. 

 

 

 

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, Quietguy said:

Annabel moved her legs apart,

and inserted a bottle of Singha.

When she put it down again,

To seize it i did not linger'.

good one QG!

but i grant you poetic licence..... it was a bottle of Leo...... i know, i still have it......

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, Quinn said:

You all should get out more 5555  I'm not joining in but here's a starter for one. Parody this !

do i win a free Soda?

 

I met my love in the Katty Bar

Dream of her now from afar

then I was love ‘P’, but now not so

Jimmy Cargo

Jimmy Cargo.

 

She was sat with teya and Moon

I said my love “I’ll be back soon

Off to simple simons now I go”

Jimmy Cargo

Jimmy cargo.

 

I took from her a facebook address

Thai Friendly  i.d too I guess

Now it’s long distance love I know

Jimmy Cargo

 Jimmy Cargo

 

I’ll be back to her one day

One Corona’s gone away

Back to Sunny I will go

Jimmy Cargo

Jimmy Cargo

:biggrin:

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Back to eating your eggy ! Was looking for a alternate version of Dirty Old Town ie: Pattaya instead of Salford. !

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...