Pulci Gorgon

This little story actually happened in AC and was faithfully reported by someone from that town whose name I won’t reveal — let's just say it starts with an S and ends with an E. One evening, a punter was partying with a fistful of local ladyboys around the hotel pool. (The story doesn’t say exactly who the tourist was — S...e who was partying with them didn’t tell.) Here’s how a bit of the conversation went with one of his new conquests: Him: "You're stunning... you have the most gorgeous body." Her (smiling): "Salamat, I know, aking mahal. It's because I spend a lot of time swimming in the pool." Him: "Well, honey, you might want to spend even more time with your head underwater."

The last time I was in Bangkok, I had seen quite a few ladyboys in massage shops on Sukhumvit between soi 3 and soi 7.

If you do like her, you've got to offer her Chanel N° 19.

I heard about his passing this evening, between reading Rom's trip report. Pope Francis – Jorge Bergoglio – passed away this morning. I’m not very religious, but it still hit me. He was a standout personality among the popes, and I admired his way of speaking bluntly. There will be plenty of commentary in the newspapers if you want to know more about him. I’m not sure how non-Catholics are reacting to this. I feel sad for him.

Respect for religion? You? Please. The only miracle is that the bigots from you-know-where haven’t tried to exorcise you yet.

I don’t remember calling you a sucker, and I really don’t think I did. I was just annoyed that she was wasting your time and money, treating you like some newbie on the scene. It left me with that sinking feeling—like, is that seriously the best there is? Anyway, I’m genuinely glad you told her not to come back. Snoop Dawg I presume ? Sad. Well done

Create your profile in the website Thaifriendly, then upload the Thaifriendly app in your Android smartphone. You need to upload the most used messenger by Thai ladyboys : Line. Go to Line then click on the Tap the Google Play icon in the bottom-left corner of the screen or just search for and download Line from the Google Play Store. Then create your profile in Line. Wechat : WeChat is also a powerful app for meeting new people, including ladyboys. At first glance, it looks similar to Line, but it has a great feature that lets you connect directly with others nearby. Just turn on your location in Android, tap ‘Discover’, then select ‘People Nearby’. You’ll see a list of users around you—almost like a radar. Then select ladyboys and start contacting them. That’s how I found ladyboys not only in Pattaya, but in many other parts of Thailand too. Reminder : never try to contact ladyboys when your are in your farangsland. You will annoy them and make them waste their time. You will waste your time too. When using Thaifrie,dly as an App, you'd betetr set your actual location or the city where you will stay on the next day. If your profile is correctly set, ladyboys will contact you and you won't need to contact them.

At least, we know this was not Cinederose since he shot the action. I ain’t the kind to snitch on two gay fellas from LBP—especially not when I’m a law-abidin’ friend of the Wandering Sausage, and their kind of humor’s been straightjacketed so long it forgot how to breathe.

He said inexpensive. I found Woraburi at 71 €. For my last trips in Bangkok, I used to go to the Fusion Suite in the same block as Terminal 21, fairly close to Soi Cow Boy and at a reasonable walking distance from NANA (just enough for a warm-up before reaching Nana and enjoy waitching freelancers on Sukhumvit). I used to pay around 35 € in hotels.com. I checked tonight and found 26 € in Google, 55 € in hotels.com, 86 € in Booking.com and 32 € in Agoda.

Two farang bump into each other in Pattaya, and one’s ready to show off. “Buddy, lemme show you how to drink all night and hit half the bars in this town—for barely a buck.” They stop by a fast-food joint, and the first farang orders a sausage for 30 baht. “Alright, here’s the deal. We walk into a bar, get some drinks, then I slip the sausage in my fly. When it’s time to leave, you get down on your knees and start goin’ to suck the sausage. The boss’ll freak, toss us out, no bill, no questions asked.” The second guy’s lookin’ a bit confused. “You kiddin’ me?” “Nah, dead serious,” says the first guy, grinning. “Done it in bars already. Worst case, you get slapped. Best case, free booze and a legendary story for the Romscars.” They hit the first bar. Two beers in, the sausage is in place, and the second farang gets on his knees, like he’s at a buffet in Germany. Sure enough, the owner screams, tosses ‘em out, chairs flying everywhere. They stumble into the street, laughin’ their asses off. “One down,” says the first farang. “Ten more and we’ll be the shitfaced kings of Pattaya—all for the price of a damn frankfurter.” They walk into the second bar, like pros now. Same setup—drinks ordered, sausage in the fly, fake blowjob on the way. But this time, the first guy pulls out a napkin and draws a smiley face on the sausage—two dots and a crooked grin. “Gives it some personality,” he says, deadpan. The second guy bursts out laughin’, but he goes with it. Drops to his knees, starts sucking the sausage. The bartender freezes, yells somethin’ in Thai, and they’re out again, this time with a mop thrown at ‘em. Once outside, they’re cryin’ from laughin’. “Man,” says the second farang, “the smiley face was a bit too much.” “That’s what made it work!” the first one cackles. “Art, buddy. That’s performance art.” They keep the same routine, tweakin’ things at each bar. By the tenth, they’re improvizin’ like crazy—“Don’t judge us, love is love!” At one point, a tourist films ‘em and posts the video on TikTok. It’ll soon be up on Cinederose's Instagram too. By bar twenty, they’re completely wrecked, shoutin’ lines like they’re in a play no one paid to see. It’s barely midnight, but they’ve got that thousand-yard stare, like battle-hardened vets. The guy who’s been on his knees turns to his buddy, all slumped over, eyes bloodshot. “Wait a minute, buddy,” he says. “Can we switch it up a little? I’m startin’ to feel like a circus animal. Kneelin’ down all the time, I’m tired as hell.”The other guy rubs his face, bleary-eyed, like he’s just wakin’ up. “Yeah, I’m with ya,” he says. “I’m tired too... especially since I dropped the sausage when we left the third bar.”