What am I Doing?

[bumblebee]

Just wondering does this ever happen to the rest of you fine gentlemen.  Even after all these years of partaking in the wonderful world of ladyboys, from time to time I get these sudden moments(of clarity?) where I ask myself what the hell am I doing sucking COCK or getting turned on looking at them on the interweb, the shemale variety of course.

 

These thoughts are fleeting of course and in no time I am back to my normal cock craving self, but it does happen.

 

[wangsuda]

for me, it all depends on my mood. Most times I love the ladyboys. sometimes a good romp with a women. And on those rare occasions, solitude is excellent.

[pacman]

Such self reflection is indicative of someone on the verge of a midlife crisis. Of course it doesn't follow that you must end up in 'crisis' but at various times we all take stock of where we are in life.

 

Don't fight it BB, it is part of our innate coping mechanism that keeps us sane. Perhaps your subconscious is reminding you that you could have settled down & raised a family? The forlorn hope our parents held for us can often manifest in moments of regret.

 

Relax. What's done is done. I cannot express it any better than the Bard himself when Polonius said to Hamlet:

 

To thine own self be true.

[Luung]

Great words Packkers!

 

And yep, It's just the male menopause 'BB', don't worry about it, I'd be more concerned about the flushes!

 

But seriously, I think that if you're a 'normally aspirated bloke who doesn't consider himself gay then your subconscious mind's going to be inevitably & continually asking questions like, "What the fuuuuuuuckk am I doing, this thing's got a fuuuuuckkkin' pair of bollocks"!!!

 

In spite of doing this for 14 years now & being into the porn before that, sometimes my mind can makes sence of it & justify it & sometimes it can't, sometimes it feels natural & sometimes it dosen't, sometimes I feel embarrased about it & sometimes I can stare the whole world down about it... And that's no matter what I''m actually telling myself at the time.

 

And I tend to go in cycles too & I seem to be coming out of my current LB cycle right now & very much feel the need for a properly aspirated & fully oviolating female & this can just come on of its own accord or be brought on by a ladyboy glut, as is probably the case right now, having recently distanced myself emotionally from an LB (friend/ex/whatever) whom I'd been physically distanced from, I've now gone straight out & done the 'geezer' thing & started banging the local LB talent left right & centre, any hole a goal stylie (ask Bubba)!!

 

Right now it's just all got too much for me again, a complete & utter fuckin' overload, from undergoing the normal (to ths little world) emotional bashing from pillar to post from an ex who loves going out of her way to being ridiculously & distastetfully conspicuos in public arenas to me now running around like an anxiety ridden headless chicken getting jammed bollock deep in a seemingly never ending succession of blokes in skirts with fuckin' stubble.

 

Funnily enough, during the last cycle I met a cute little GG on the net who became a girlfriend & guess what?... she'd owned a ladyboy caberete in Hua Hin & a gay gogo in CNX for twenty years... Christ, I can't even get away from this scene if I try!

 

3 +1's & a box of choclate buiscuts if you can name the LB caberet BB????

 

This veered straight into the 'pleasure or lifestyle' thread didn't it

[williethepimp]

quote Lung..

 

"!In spite of doing this for 14 years now & being into the porn before that, sometimes my mind can makes sence of it & justify it & sometimes it can't, sometimes it feels natural & sometimes it dosen't, sometimes I feel embarrased about it & sometimes I can stare the whole world down about it... And that's no matter what I''m actually telling myself at the time.

 

And I tend to go in cycles too & I seem to be coming out of my current LB cycle right now & very much feel the need for a properly aspirated & fully oviolating female & this can just come on of its own accord or be brought on by a ladyboy glut, as is probably the case right now,"

 

Beautifully put Lung....for me its a cyclical thing also......after having spent several weeks living with a LB I started to crave pussy...I'd stuffed my face with so much dick i just wanted a nice baldy minge to lick and suck instead....

 

 I'm currently on a gg cycle .....but that could also change anytime given the circumstances...isn't it great to be (for want of a better word) ........free......

[bumblebee]

Thanks for the concern boys but it is more just a curious observation and reality check that I am sucking a "mickey" as we called it when I was young lad.  Interesting that you mention cycles of GGs and LBs, a topic for a thread in itself no doubt.  

I am just wondering how you would react when you are going through a GG cycle and you clock a panty bulge on an LB while out with your GG.  Would that particular cycle come to a screeching halt? 

[SiamSam]

I am on FULL pussy and cock cycle 24/7/12. Doesn't matter. Who ever smiles at me first. 

[etgohm]

I agree with Sam...... Any port in a storm!

On my last trip my ratio was about 20:1 for lbs and frankly it didn't bother me, but there was one night where l was struggling to keep going and l started to think about an incredibly sexy GG that l was with and it put me over the top. The old mind can sure play tricks on you.

ET

[4:17]

I think perhaps some are over analyzing this in BB's case. I think it's only natural, particularly given where BB was born and raised and where he currently lives half the year, that every once in while he catches himself thinking "Holy shit look at what I've been getting up to?"

 

Doesn't necessarily mean he's having a crisis or questioning his identity. In fact BB strikes me as one of the more self-possessed and secure individuals in this little subculture of ours that I've met -- a subculture with some colorful characters, to say the least.

 

[bumblebee]

I think perhaps some are over analyzing this in BB's case. I think it's only natural, particularly given where BB was born and raised and where he currently lives half the year, that every once in while he catches himself thinking "Holy shit look at what I've been getting up to?"

 

Doesn't necessarily mean he's having a crisis or questioning his identity. In fact BB strikes me as one of the more self-possessed and secure individuals in this little subculture of ours that I've met -- a subculture with some colorful characters, to say the least.

 

More a case of what have I been getting into?   Thanks for the reference 17, and I am sure I am not the only one who has had the holy shit... moment.    

[Uncle]

I'm another who often experiences a moment just as I'm about to enjoy a mouthfull of ladyboy cock, which is an activity that up to just a few years ago had never entered my wildest dreams. 

 

Another is when I'm back home after a trip. I usually take a couple of weeks to mentally recover from the assault on the senses that is Thailand.

Often I find I have a moment of clarity when I'm back at work or with some friends and some of my experiences run through my mind. 

 

I sometimes wonder if it was all a dream.

[Lone Ranger]

I only think WTF am I doing when their is a cash flow. But when the money comes raining in, it's all change to countdown mode and that moment of clarity as passed till the next cash flow.  

[Hoot]

Those moments of questioning myself come and go.  There have been some trips where it never crosses my mind.  Other times I've had that moment of hesitation, just like it was my first time all over again.  They are fleeting.

 

Overall I've found that liking ladyboys and this counter culture we are a part of has been a huge mind fuck for me.  What really gets me isn't the momentary question before I'm going down or other carnal pleasure, it's the sustainability of it all.  

[Guest JustSumGai]

Those moments of questioning myself come and go.  There have been some trips where it never crosses my mind.  Other times I've had that moment of hesitation, just like it was my first time all over again.  They are fleeting.

 

Overall I've found that liking ladyboys and this counter culture we are a part of has been a huge mind fuck for me.  What really gets me isn't the momentary question before I'm going down or other carnal pleasure, it's the sustainability of it all.  

maybe relative to this is what I wonder more. Why the fuck am **I** paying THEM to get sexual pleasure from me? I mean I don't even cum half the time.  They sure do. So relating to cashflow, if I HAVE some, i'm THERE, but then I'm knowing it's not sustainable because it's NUTS to pay someone else to get off.  Frankly getting old may be a charm, I care less and less about sex unless THEY want it. And soon it'll be a case of "oh? you horny? ok, but I NO PAY YOU TO CUM. Free or go away. 

    Now don't this open a host of comments and wonderings? Like...how can any p4p ladyboy ever really get horny? I mean crap, a good one is fucked sucked and drained on an almost daily basis. Relating to the "where do the older ladyboys go" thread, some said they don't really look for the young ones. Well HELL...they're the ones that might actually need to get fucked or sucked daily. 

     Ok, so I veered badly hehe. I find it odd how much I do love a good hard one stuck in me, but don't have the BB moment. 

BB, I think you should examine this and go for the GG for a bit to be sure. I'll hold your ladyboy lil black book while you do :)