soiboy

Kudos to Kahuna for fighting the good (but seemingly hopeless) fight to set people straight on what the term "femboy" means! For me a "pure" LB is, indeed, the third sex - both male and female features embodied and personified. I suppose I was always predisposed to find LBs attractive because the terms I always used to describe the sort of women I'm attracted to include "outdoorsy", "athletic", "tomboy-ish", and "feminine." Put those together and you get LBs! I think that some people setting out on the LB path may seek out a female replica to make it all more, ahem, "palatable." Perhaps some stick with female replicas out of some level of denial. The reality is that truly "passable" LBs are very few; maybe 5% - 10%. (Fortunately, there is a 10% increase in passability with every beer consumed!) I don't care for the Amazon LBs; being F1 pilot-sized they frighten me! lol I also don't care for the LBs with strongly masculine facial features. But, that leaves a huge middle range to pick and choose from! There is a Finnish guy who posts LB pics on various forums. He has an interesting style that sort of blends traditional glamor (being American the soiboy eschews superfluous "u"s...) photography with a stark realism. His work captures well the uniqueness, for better or worse, of the LB look. (His work also calls the lie to any particular bar having a lock on all the best looking LBs...)

I love the greater soi 4 street scene in BKK. Especially now with the alco-carts and freelancers all blending together. I haven't set foot in Nana Plaza proper in probably 3 years now. The sidewalk is the soiboy's sporting venue of choice in BKK. Pattaya is a different thing entirely with its huge number of open beer bars, both clustered together in the main areas and scattered all over the place. I just don't really see the need for doing the Beach Road thing, and have never given it a try. Plus, it does get sort of spooky there in the early morning hours. I can easily see why girls freelance in BKK rather than work in a bar. I'm not so sure about why they do so in Pattaya, at least outside some sort of connection with a bar(s).

That looks like fun, duke! But I'm afraid if I tried that with my NY Giants number 10 jersey I'd get creeped out thinking that I was going down on Eli Manning!

OK, this will undoubtedly sound really perverted to this crowd... I really tire of the slut look. Sure, it's great at first, all the long legs and butt cheeks and boobs pushed to the stratosphere, but in all honesty it grows tiresome. Well, OK, maybe just a little tiresome. There is a genuine beauty in our beloved LBs that ultimately is reduced to caricature by such garb. Part of this is due to what is available in the clothing stalls at the local street markets, and part is due to monger market pressure and the perceived look they feel they need to convey. But seriously, how can you go out to regular places with them if they are dressed like that? So, the soiboy brings his favorites the clothes he likes to see them in. For example, the everyday outfit I like to see them in consists of a nice top or t-shirt and khaki walking shorts of the Talbots/Brooks Brothers/Ralph Lauren/J Crew/Land's End/Banana Republic sort, and well made flats of the Coach/Cole Haan sort. The soiboy has his sources to get such items for pennies on the dollar. (It's amazing how much good stuff apparently just falls off trucks...). What can I say? I was hopelessly imprinted by the girls of my adolescent environment. You can take the soiboy out of the prep school but you can't take the prep school out of the soiboy!

The small beer bar complex at the Karon/Kata junction has some LBs in the middle bar between two others that seemed to have mostly GGs. I spent a couple of nights there just drinking with a few of them last December. They were funny. New to the scene and still getting the make-up and clothes thing down. The soiboy was more than happy to offer his grooming and dressing suggestions. In turn they offered thanks in the traditional way of their people by rubbing my crotch. I love traditional cultures. I didn't take it further because I had thrown myself into diving almost every day for two weeks and I was beat, and was soon off to Pattaya anyway for debauchery purposes. I may have to rectify this during my next Phuket holiday, though. I like staying in Kata, and there definitely are some LB options there, though obviously not like in Patong.

Steppenwolf's "Born to be Wild" and Guns & Roses "Sweet Child O' Mine" both rock and have very distinctive riffs - play just a few notes of either and you know the song right away. If a jukebox has those on tap I always play them.

Shoulders. Seriously. What attracts me most to LBs is their physique, which mimics the physique of Western athletic women, especially tennis players, skiers, and golfers. Broad shoulders, slender hips, and well-defined musculature. The ladies final at the French Open last week is a good example. Sharapova vs. Halep. Both lean and strong with great shoulders! (Check out some great pics of them at the French Open in Sports illustrated online.) A few years ago skiing champion Lindsey Vonn posed for Sports Illustrated. Some women at work were making comments like, "She looks like a man." "Look at those muscles." "Look at her thick waist." I was just thinking, "Man, she's got a LB build...if only she had a cock!" Lean, strong, and well-toned femininity does it for me every time!

No, no, no, not the soiboy leaving the seedy world of P4P. Don’t be ridiculous! Rather, LBs leaving P4P. I’ve been thinking about this since I returned from a two-week trip to LOS last month. It was a short trip, but I needed a LB fix to tide me over until the fall. First a few days of mongering in BKK, followed by a few days with a favorite there, and finally several days in Pattaya with another favorite. Both favorites are real sweethearts; LB-next-door types. Neither has any threads about them in any forum. Neither has even been mentioned in any context in any forum as far as I know. They are among the sizeable “silent majority” of LBs quietly working the scene to help themselves and their families. No 60,000 baht monthly incomes, no multiple customers a day, no sponsors. Life in the real LB world. And both are now “thinking too much” about what it all means. BKK - BKK sweetie actually has made 60,000 baht in a good month, not in P4P but from commissions made working in a call center. She has drifted between P4P and mainstream jobs for several years. Recently she has been out of P4P while living with a farang boyfriend in BKK, taking care of him and his apartment, but making no salary. No money to buy herself anything, or to buy her family anything. Farang boyfriend thinks that as long as she has a roof over her head then she should be happy, although while he is back home for a while this summer she has moved back to her old room. She asked me what I thought, and I told her I thought she was being used. But, she is pushing her late 20s now and is looking for some sort of relationship. It was never easy money when working P4P. Customers have been in increasingly short supply in the past few years, and especially so now. As we left it, she thinks she will start to look for a mainstream job and move back permanently to her old room. The writing is on the wall that there is no future with this particular boyfriend. He may be a nice guy, but doesn’t have much money and doesn’t understand her wanting to spend time with her family and help them out. She may go back to freelancing in the meantime. She’s tired of living on a very slender shoestring budget. Pattaya - Pattaya sweetie’s story has been told thousands of times before. Finished high school in Isaan but no decent jobs available. Worked 6 days a week in a crappy factory to make 5,000 baht a month. Moved to Pattaya and worked as a maid in a hotel. Was told one day that she could make more money if she didn’t mind having sex with farangs. And so it began. Three years later, though, she wonders aloud what she has to show for it. But what to do? Where to go? Her parents work, and she only has one sibling. Her main goals have been to build her family a decent house and make sure her little brother stays in school. But even with these limited (and laudable) goals where will the money come from to finish the house? Will there ever be money for little brother to go to college, something she never had a chance to do? Low season is always the time when such thoughts come to the fore. But things are different now in Thailand. It certainly feels different. Indeed, will there ever be high seasons again as we remember them? It doesn’t look like it, for many reasons. So, what is the tipping point for LBs to leave P4P? Are we there yet? Are these two there yet? I don’t know. What are some thoughts and experiences?

Funny. When I visit my Pattaya LB sweetie I generally bring her some clothes. The shoes I bring her are always nice sandals or ballet flats of some sort (US women's size 8B; she has reasonably pleasantly sized feet!). She will say, "Where are high heels?" and I will say, in Seinfeld "soup Nazi" voice, "No high heels for you! Only good girl shoes!" and we just laugh...

For a pure 1 hour or less ST it's moot if she can speak much English or not. But, pure STs comprise only about 25% of my LB encounters these days. I like to spend time with LBs. That requires at least some conversational English ability. Really, the ones I have the most fun with may be just 6 or 7s on the looks scale, but speak passable English and are 8, 9, or 10s on the personality scale. That makes up for a lot. I remember working a construction job during summer break while in high school. A couple of us were talking about a really beautiful cheerleader at our school. An older worker was listening but just smiling and shaking his head. His advice about women and life? "What you want is a plain face, a sweet personality, and big tits." Over the years I've increasingly seen the wisdom in that advice...with English ability and hormonal tits thrown into the mix...

That's never happened to me, but when I'm on mongering patrol I usually take one Cialis a day. That means that after a couple of days I routinely wake up with morning wood that takes me back to being 17 again. Most of the time when I try to take advantage of that with my sweetie from the night before lying beside me my attempts at early morning butt banditry are met with a karate-like chop and a quick "NO!". The thought of my little pal Woodrow being broken in two like one of the planks of wood in a karate demonstration, well, too horrible to think about! One of my semi-regulars is lacking in some departments, but is still on the list because she actually said to me that it was OK if I fucked her in the morning, just to use a condom and lube and try not to wake her up! The first time I thought she was joking, but sure enough the next morning was bliss as I gave it a go. Near the end she did wake up, just laughed, and asked me if I was happy now. Very happy! My two ex-wives were never like that!

Well, if I was posting on “that other” forum (which I never have and never will), my answer might be: “fecking hel! I dont give a fick how the lying pieces of shit see me! I pays my money and they bend over and take it! and if I want thyere cock in me then thas what thell do! f*ck them all! lying ass cunts only good for ficking. that’s how I see themn and thas all that matter!” Fortunately, this is a different forum. Language and terminology are always problematic when talking about LBs (for example, don’t even think about getting the soiboy started on why the term “femboy” should never have entered the LB lexicon). Nonetheless, for the most part those familiar with LBs generally know what is meant in such discussions. Also, it is only through spending significant time with LBs, one on one, that you at least begin to understand their world view. That as preface, most of the LBs that truly always felt that they were born the wrong sex, who played with dolls when young, who liked pretty girls clothes, etc. definitely think it is strange for a guy who allegedly is not gay to like having a cock up his ass. I’ve had several such LBs ask me why guys like it. Why they don’t just go to Boyztown or Sunnee Plaza and get a boy. This then leads to discussion of why they themselves like to be fucked. Most will say that it is because they want to be a woman, indeed they feel themselves to be such, and thus it is proper that they be the fuckee. And most will say that they enjoy it, within reason, but there certainly are many who don’t particularly like being fucked. Here again it is always important to keep in mind that what they will do with a customer and what they would really prefer to do are often two different things. The LBs who go on hormones know that they are potentially passing up on a few thousand baht of revenue a month by no longer being able to top, or at least not being able to do it very well. But, they like the feminizing effects of taking hormones. And, they know that at least half of their customers don’t care to be topped anyway. One thing for sure is that guys who treat them as a lady, enjoy their femininity, enjoy their company, see them as a person and not a freak or just an anal meat sleeve for a quick drunken fuck are seen comparatvely favorably.

The last cold one before going home is a bit of a sad quaff, even if you know you will be back in just a few months. But that first cold one is always the best. I’ve always had my first cold one in BKK, mostly in the Soi 4 area, venturing on to Phuket or Pattaya in subsequent days. Yes, the sights and sounds and smells and a frosty cold one combine into a heady mix for sure. It’s definitely reinvigorating after some 30 hours total of transit time! Since Delta started flying to BKK a few years ago that is how get there because most of my frequent flyer miles are on Delta. The problem is that the flight from NRT doesn’t get in to BKK until around midnight, so it can be a challenge to have a cold one in hand at one of the bars with street-side seating before 2:00 am. That’s where the proliferation of alco-carts on Sukhumvit has been a welcomed innovation. My last trip in January I didn’t get checked into the soiboy’s preferred “Die-Nasty Inn” until 2:30am. The bars were closed or closing by then, but the alco-carts were in full swing. Great! Well into my first cold one a freelancer I’ve been with a couple of times spotted me and her radar locked on target like a cruise missile. In a split second she was sitting there at my little table enjoying a cold one too. She has always been good company. Great again! Off to the room! Three hours after touchdown, and one hour after check-in, I had already had two cold ones and now had a cute little cock in my mouth. Oh, and the first droplets of LB cum on a trip taste better than the last also.

Interesting observation. I first noticed this a few years ago in Phuket where a business owner, usually a farang, would keep a bottle at his regular nearby bar/restaurant. Because his particular business would potentially generate revenue for that place by steering customers it's way, I assumed it was a quid pro quo sort of thing. In particular, I know a couple of dive shop owners who keep a bottle at a nearby place they tend to steer their clients to. It seems like they pay just for mixers for their drinks. So, yes, in Thailand one hand indeed washes the other.

Walking around Pattaya looking for LBs is like walking around with a Geiger counter. Generally, there is a steady "beep...beep...beep..." of background LB detection. Then there comes the rapidly escalating "beep.beep.beep.beep" indication of high LB ionization, such as in the areas mentioned. That then subsides and again the steady "beep...beep...beep..." More and more I like the steady "beep...beep...beep..." Like the LB I saw last trip at the Soi Buakhao market helping her aunt during the day at the soup stall, and the LB at the pharmacy I got some decongestant from. beep...beep...beep...

Four weeks? Short hair? Five o'clock shadow? Mustache? Hmmm...four weeks in the monkey house without the often used daily double dose of birth control pills, or regularly administered shots? There's a lot of variation in the presentation of male secondary sexual characteristics in LBs. The real femmy types don't exhibit all that much facial and body hair. Hormone supplementation enhances that even more, adding overall softness and perky, budding A-cup breasts with mocha/rose-colored puffy nipples...(dammit, now I'm getting a hard-on...). I'm sure that the femmy's unaltered hormonal profiles are more typically female than male to begin with, which likely explains a lot of their gender orientation as well. Hormones or no, LBs with thicker stubble than me scare me...now, back to those mocha/rose-colored puffy nipples...

The soiboy has skied forever, so that is what I focused my attention on; well, as best I could given NBC's crap-ass coverage. US veterans Bode Miller and Julia Mancuso won bronze medals in Super-G and Super Combined, respectively. Ted Ligety won the gold medal in Giant Slalom, the discipline he has dominated for the past few seasons. And 18-year-old slalom phenom Mikaela Shiffrin won the gold medal in that event. So a pretty good games for the US Alpine team. Oh, and just to make sure I'm not gay I watched a lot of figure skating. I would bang any of the women figure skaters in a heartbeat, but none of the men skaters did anything for me no matter how much they minced about on the ice, and boy did some of them ever mince! Whew! Am I relieved!

Yes, in your position you need to be careful about that. One thing you could do is reserve your mongering for Pattaya where the likelihood of being outed would be very small. Keep BKK for your non-P4P LB pursuits. One other thing to do in BKK is check the British, US, Canadian, and Australian embassies for postings about any social events around town. I know westerners in New Delhi and Kathmandu who network about town through such avenues. This will also help getting you out and about in the sort of circles that may lead you to a college educated, super-model looks LB who speaks fluent English and whose father is a multi-millionaire corporate baron who will embrace you as the son he, well, sort of had and still does in a way...

Yet another funny story from my recent stay in Pattaya. One afternoon my sweetie and I saw Captain Phillips at Central Festival. I had heard about Thais being rather somewhat racist, but had never really had any experience with it. After the movie I asked Sweetie what she thought about the ending. She said, "Good. They black. I don't like." A bit taken aback I pointed out that they got what they got because they were pirates, not because they were black. Her reply? "Yes, black pirates." Oh, my...

Speaking Thai and living in BKK certainly gives you, ahem, two legs up shall we say when it comes to meeting LBs. Of course, there is that unfortunate teacher's salary that places limits. Nonetheless, take advantage of the network of friends and contacts that you are making to integrate yourself into social activities in the evenings and on weekends. These don't have to be expensive outings. Act like a grad student in seeking out free and interesting things to do. I would keep your interest in LBs quiet around your work colleagues, however, at least at the outset if not forever. Take advantage of any invitation offered for any get-together or party. Inevitably, if you get hooked up with the right social group of young Thai professionals you will come across non-P4P LBs of the sort that you are looking for. Go to free lectures and exhibits at universities, art galleries, etc. Go to plays and concerts. Again, you speak Thai. That gives you entree to the Thai upper/middle-crust yuppie artsy world that us fly-through LB lovers simply don't have access to as we ogle those Soi 4 hellions. What I'm describing to you, of course, is exactly how educated young professionals meet up anywhere. That your interest is LBs doesn't change the basic formula. Good luck! Drop a posting once in a while to let us know how it's going.

That whole little area that we're talking about seems to be teeming with LBs these days. There is a bar kitty-corner across the street from Fantasy Lounge, called "Noi" bar or something like that? I've enjoyed beers there before in the evening just watching the action getting started on the street, but I've not been in there later in the night. Has anyone noticed if freelancers use that bar? It seems like that bar is perfectly situated to make a few thousand baht from drinks and barfines from the LB freelancers in the vicinity. If I was the bar owner I'd sure be saying to the sweeties, "Have a seat, take a load off your feet, those shoes you have on certainly can't be very comfortable. Now, what would you and Mr. Customer like to drink?"

It happens occasionally, and it’s always a disappointment when it does, but nothing really to be done about it. The last time this happened to me, though, it was entirely my fault. It was a couple of years ago in one of the Soi Diana bars. There was a young LB there (just 20 years old) who was new to the game and she was absolutely gorgeous. Tall and lean, not wearing tawdry slutwear but just skin-tight jeans and a nice blouse. Hair pulled back and up on her head, and not too much make-up. A classic Siamese beauty. Fine-featured face, long slender neck…whew! Her face truly could have come straight from a carving on an ancient temple wall. She was very quiet and aloof, though, which I took to be shyness due to being so fresh. No matter, I had to have her. I just wanted to enjoy her beauty. I remember joking to myself that even if I end up just masturbating while looking at her it will still be OK. How not so far from the truth that turned out to be! The mamasan/bar tender was nice and was guiding her through the process. 2000 baht LT. I didn’t argue. I was smitten, and that included the barfine anyway. I wanted her all night. Well, she was a classic all right…the classic shy dead fish in bed. We exchanged mutual blowjobs. Her cock was as classically magnificent as the rest of her, but her blowjob performance was of the perfunctory mostly a handjob variety. I lubed up a finger and was diddling her tight pucker when she said no boom-boom because it hurts. I used all the soiboy charm (copyright 1995, 1997, 2002) I could muster, telling her that we would go slow, etc. etc. No go. We lay around a bit then drifted off to sleep. She was as stiff and rigid a person sleeping as she was awake. No cuddling, no spooning, no pretence of affection at all. In the morning a mutual blowjob repeat of the previous night, and then she dressed and left. Done. I had a 5th floor room at the Dynasty Inn on Soi 13 and 2nd Road, directly over the front entrance. After I got the call from reception confirming that I was still alive and not robbed blind, I went to the small balcony and watched her walk down the soi to the corner to get a motorbike taxi. “Goodbye my Siamese beauty”, I said out loud, “We’ll never meet again.” And, in fact, I have not seen hide nor hair of her since. I have a strong feeling she was like undoubtedly many who give the business a try but never make their peace with it. They just move on to something else or move home.

I've had the pleasure(?) of seeing these sorts of lb-tourist altercations. They typically are "blink and you miss it" sort of things involving an unappreciated overture on the part of a lb. But, any prolonged or really serious fighting could potentially cause the police to come. And, yes, the old "high heel to the head" martial arts move can be brutally effective. Scalp wounds bleed profusely thereby adding to the drama. Funny aside. On my most recent trip my sweetie and I were walking down Soi Buakhao one night. Because of the traffic it is all but impossible to walk side-by-side. I usually walk directly behind my sweetie. (I tell her that is because she knows where she is going, and that I will follow her anywhere. She loves that! Actually, I just like watching her legs and ass.) Usually we walk close enough and are talking, so the lbs along the route leave me alone. Professional courtesy I suppose. Anyway, this one time I was walking in the lead and sweetie was lagging a bit behind. This was in front of the new Fantasy Lounge and a lb there grabbed my arm and invited me in for a drink (as is the way of their people, especially when a devilshly handsome white explorer walks past...). Well, in a split second sweetie was right there. A few terse words were exchanged between sweetie and the lb who (understandably...) couldn't keep her hands off me. Simultaneous dismissive head turnings/hair flicks quickly brought the encounter to an end. Needless to say, the soiboy thought this was funny. Sweetie most definitely did not. Silence. When we got to a bar on Soi Diana where a friend of hers works she finally said, "Why she say she know you?" Ruh Roh! My mind immediately went to Bill Clinton - "I did not have sex with that woman. [it was just a blowjob.]" In fact, I did not know her, so I just told Sweetie that that is a new place and I don't know anyone there (I wisely omitted the "yet"). That placated her ever so slightly, and then she told me something I hadn't heard before. Evidently, at times lbs who don't know each other will engage in a bit of trash talking. I imagine something along the lines of, "I know your boyfriend." "No you don't. He has better taste than to go with you." "Yes, I do. He paid me 2000 baht for short time. What he pay you, 500 baht?" "Why would my boyfriend pay you 2000 baht to get a disease?" That sort of thing, at least as I like to imagine it.

Ah, yes...Mary Ann vs. Ginger. A debate for the ages. I always wanted Mary Ann...wearing one of Ginger's black lace Frederick's of Hollywood push-up bras. You just KNOW that under those evening gowns Ginger was wearing a black lace push-up bra from Frederick's of Hollywood. At least that's how I imagined it...alone...in the bathroom...

Yes, there was a morlam last night at the x-cyte beer garden site (big empty lot, actually) on third road near the Soi Chaiyapoon intersection. Some of my LB sweetie's friends went with their BFs/customers, but she was not interested as she finds the morlams in Pattaya to be just big loud drunken parties; the morlams she fondly recalls from her Isaan youth sound like they were more family and community oriented entertainment. We walked by the morlam after dinner and it did indeed sound loud!