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Flicks, Huffs and Stares


bumblebee

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"If I had hair I'd flick it at you."-SLBT

Sometimes we must all wonder why do we bother. We are preoccupied with these exotic creatures, yet on occasion their childish behaviour can be so frustrating and at times amusing. Two incidents on my recent time in Patts illustrate this rolling of the eyes to heaven.

One night a group of us visited Sugar and Spice in Jomtien. We had one round of drinks, and chatted with the girls, no false promises or for that any promises were made.

Later on that night, Hoot and I were making our way home along Pattaya Tai night market when 2 girls from Koyo came out of a side soi. We exchanged acknowledgements and for a few seconds they happened to be walking alongside us. This brief period coincided with us passing 2 of the Sugar and Spice girls standing on the kerb trying to cross the road.

As soon as they saw what they though they were seeing, basically the two of us walking home with 2 other ladyboys, they gave us a stare and the old hair flick. Enough said.

On another night, after one of the Morlam gigs, Hoot and I were chilling outside Famous when two of the girls arrived back quite drunk on the back of a motorbike.

One of them asked me for a 100 Baht for the taxi driver. I looked over my shoulder and saw a young Thai guy astride the bike. I immediately said no,(no way was I giving some bf/gik/brother) any of my money. The demand was reduced to 20 baht, nice of her but I still refused. Why did they get on a bike if they knew they could not pay at the other end, chancers.

I said ask Lita for the money. With that I got a stream of abuse, "you not take my photos anymore, you take all my photos off internet" "You bad man" etc. More eye rolling and wondering why we bother.

Any similar childish experiences gents?? :rolleyes:

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Any similar childish experiences gents??

Yes.

Oh, with the girls? I thought you meant with some of the BM's of other boards.

WIth the girls, my recent weird experience with May comes to mind. I took her two nights in a row, and we seemed to have a great old time. Paid her better than I pay the girls normally too. (Maybe that was part of the problem?)

Told her both times I was a butterfly and would take a different girl the next time (maybe that was part of the problem - I didn't take someone different the second night!)

On third night I bought her a drink and told her I was going to barfine someone else tonight but I buy her drink first to show her respect. Then bought drink for Gitar and May started insisting I barfine them both. When I wouldn't and didn't I started getting the hair-flick and cold shoulder, which lasted the rest of my trip.

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Come on guys!!! Reverse it all. It wouldn't be dissimilar if you were on the receiving end. They are only human, and like us, they are subject to a meaningful emotional connection, love, et cetera. I think we sometimes forget this. Just because we are paying does not mean they aren't also in their own way. These are people in need of love, connection, security, happiness, fulfillment, and joy. Much like the rest of us.

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Come on guys!!! Reverse it all. It wouldn't be dissimilar if you were on the receiving end. They are only human, and like us, they are subject to a meaningful emotional connection, love, et cetera. I think we sometimes forget this. Just because we are paying does not mean they aren't also in their own way. These are people in need of love, connection, security, happiness, fulfillment, and joy. Much like the rest of us.

Well said, Siam Sam. :thumbsu:

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Maybe it was just the company you were keeping those evenings Bumblebee :pardon:

I remember both those interactions well, the second really stands out. You left out the part about her kissing the supposed 'taxi driver'. That abuse she was giving was enough to make me uncomfortable - good thing we found another chill out bar on the way back ending my trip on a high note, and with a wicked hangover :D

Hard to believe I've been back 3 weeks, the trip already seems like ages ago.

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On another night, after one of the Morlam gigs, Hoot and I were chilling outside Famous when two of the girls arrived back quite drunk on the back of a motorbike.

One of them asked me for a 100 Baht for the taxi driver. I looked over my shoulder and saw a young Thai guy astride the bike. I immediately said no,(no way was I giving some bf/gik/brother) any of my money. The demand was reduced to 20 baht, nice of her but I still refused. Why did they get on a bike if they knew they could not pay at the other end, chancers.

I said ask Lita for the money. With that I got a stream of abuse, "you not take my photos anymore, you take all my photos off internet" "You bad man" etc. More eye rolling and wondering why we bother.

I'm laying 3 to 1 odds it was Soda.

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During the last Morlam, Soda smacked me good and hard in the head with her handbag and walked off in an angry huff because I wouldn't pay attention to her antics... :give_rose:

@Siam Sam While I agree that the girls are human with real feelings and I might even agree that they are "in need of love, connection, security, happiness, fulfillment, and joy", none of that justifies the huffs, stares, blind sides and smacks in the head that we get. If your logic is to be followed, then they really should only go with one of us while we are here out of respect to OUR feelings. The guys that I see in the bars, especially those from this club, are extremely well behaved and respectful. :notfair:

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I am afraid that RJS's generalization that most guys in the bars are nice to the girls is probably not true.

It's more likely guys that treat the ladies nicely are a minority. The guys who post on the forums are not the majority of the customers these ladies see.

Don't assume that a girl is lying when you hear stories of mistreatment from customers. It only has to happen a few times (and unfortunately may happen more often than that), to give them the wrong impression of farangs.

If they do happen to meet a customer who is nice, they probably feel suspicious thinking there may be an ulterior motive. Then if they see a farang in a situation that can easily be misinterpreted - they can feel their suspicions are confirmed (even if wrongly).

I'm not saying their behavior is justified, but there are more things involved that we don't often think about.

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I am afraid that RJS's generalization that most guys in the bars are nice to the girls is probably not true.

Actually, I was not intending to make this generalization, it's slightly different. My point is that I am aware of how I am treating the girls (to my mind, I am treating them respectfully). Yet it does sometimes feel as though I am still the recipient of flicks, huffs, and stares despite what I believe are good intentions on my part.

P4P and not P4P, when I treat people with respect, I am most comfortable when I am treated well in return.

I'm not saying their behavior is justified, but there are more things involved that we don't often think about.

I agree. Actually I think that what I don't understand most likely outweighs what I do understand.

Because I surround myself with guys who truly seem to be caring, respectful and concerned about the girls, it is probably easy for me to overlook those who might cause suspicion.

RJS

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The other thing to consider is the Thai mentality towards relationships. Whether male or female my experience has been they are super suspicious, paranoid, distrusting, possessive, jealous, and prone to emotional outbursts of unreasonable behaviour. They do not seem to reason in the same way as westerners. Perhaps this is an over generalization but my experience is their approach to relationships and how they view them is strikingly different from mine and not something I would want to experience for a long time, let alone live with.

Then again, what the fuck do I know...

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Actually I think that what I don't understand most likely outweighs what I do understand.

One of the truest things I've heard on here as of late, at least regarding my own understanding of these creatures.

Sam's followup also sparked some things for me. Culturally, thai's are as similar to us as we are to dolphins. We have some basic traits in common but that's about it.

I was reading the other day about western society's "long-term" view of life, and how we plan and scheme for the future. It seems like Thai's do the very opposite, and live very much in the moment. Again, could be completely wrong here.... but if that's true, I wonder how many other basic things we take for granted about our worldview would be turned on it's head if we could be in the mind of a thai for a few days.

So, with that said, it doesn't justify the flicks, huffs, and stares. But it does reinforce the fact that the little I do understand is the tip of the iceberg compared to what I don't.

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Maybe it was just the company you were keeping those evenings Bumblebee :pardon:

I remember both those interactions well, the second really stands out. You left out the part about her kissing the supposed 'taxi driver'. That abuse she was giving was enough to make me uncomfortable - good thing we found another chill out bar on the way back ending my trip on a high note, and with a wicked hangover :D

Hard to believe I've been back 3 weeks, the trip already seems like ages ago.

Interesting times we spent Hoot, if it makes you feel any better I am back home also.

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The ''If I had hair'' sentiment was a cracker BB, wasn't it..

That particular episode was centered around our little outing at Famous. I was sitting on a chair outside with BB, hoot and PDogg. Soda came by and sat on the step. I had moved my hand off the armrest and unfortunately my fingers drooped down the side of the armrest. Soda then decided to move back and pushed back the other chair next to me thus crushing my fingers.. I kinda shouted something like ''ouch, by jove that hurt'' or words to that effect. Whereby Soda looked round at me nursing my reddened and scraped fingers and turned away again without so much as a solly..

One of the girls said something to her and she asked what happened. I told her and she shrugged her shoulders.. I then said if I had hair, I'd flick it at you....

She then got the picture and apologised.

They are all a fickle bunch and you either put up with it or ignore it cause you sure as shit won't ever change it.

For me, I treat them / everyone with respect. If I dont get it back then I dont go back.. Certainly their loss, not mine.

But yeah, BB has a point.

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I had an incident outside a mini mart in Phnom Penh a few months ago that was worthy of the Jerry Springer show in its silliness. I can just picture Jerry setting the scene for the audience while I am sat on stage surrounded by the other protagonists.

Jerry: So BB let me get this straight. You were sitting outside the mini mart one night enjoying a quiet beer when the GG prostitute from the next door bar asked you to buy her and ice cream.

Me: Correct Jerry.

Jerry: and when you went in and bought the ice cream the transsexual sex worker with whom you have no relationship, but are pleasant to, saw you doing this?

Me: Correct again Jerry.

Jerry: And so a few days later, the transsexual approached you at the same table, while you were having another quiet beer with a friend and minding your own business, and muttered something in Khmer, and the only words you caught were "ice cream" and threw a photo you had given her a week earlier on the table and stormed off in a huff?

Me: Spot of Jerry, go figure.

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Interesting times we spent Hoot, if it makes you feel any better I am back home also.

Nah - I'd feel better if we were both back scouting for comfy wicker chairs in a no-hassle ladyboy friendly environment. :drinks:

The ''If I had hair'' sentiment was a cracker BB, wasn't it....

It is one of my favorite lines SLBT - I'd forgotten the circumstances until you retold them here. Makes it even funnier, at least for me. :D

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this is an interesting subject, which once this stuff starts, it throws any positive mental thoughts i have away.

ill explain.

when in thailand, i try to forget what they do for a job, and the prejudice and shit they have to put up with, and treat them as kind and nice as i can. i treat them with respect and take them to the beach etc....not giving a fuck what people think. i do my best to be nice , and not bullshit them.

however,

once this hair flick and "you boolshitts man "stuff starts,

i walk away from them and in my mind they are back to being just whores who lie, take drugs, and have to fuck arabs and all kinds of shit, and how dare they purposly disrespect me, and go on to try to fuck up my hard earned holiday with the threats, phone calls and silly bullshit.

once these thoughts kick in, im done.

they are off the repeat list forever, and can go back to the arabs.

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once this hair flick and "you boolshitts man "stuff starts,

i walk away

Same same. There's a line to be crossed.

When I meet someone that ticks my boxes I give them every benefit and every courtesy... until they give me reason not to. I wouldn't make for a good umpire in baseball, cuz one strike and you're out with farangbah... Never to be in the batters' box again...

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