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I must admit I felt a little uneasy

When she bent down to tie the laces of my shoe

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Makes you want to check your doors are locked after reading this menu :biggrin:

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1 hour ago, bumblebee said:

I reckon you would gladly leave your back door open for a couple of those items near the top

Yep  :biggrin:   :drinks:

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Business was terrible and not picking up.  I had to fire somebody, and I narrowed it down to one of two people, Debra or Jack. It was an impossible decision because they were both super workers.

Rather than flip a coin, I decided I would fire the first one who used the water cooler the next morning.

Debra came in the next morning with a horrible hangover after partying all night.  She went to the cooler to take an aspirin.

I approached her and said, "Debra, I’ve never done this before but I have to either lay you or Jack off.”

"Could you jack off for now?" she says. "I feel like shit. If you can wait, I'll do you at lunchtime."

I had to let Jack go.

Bosses have to make the tough decisions!!

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I must admit I felt a little uneasy

When she bent down to tie the laces of my shoe

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2 hours ago, Pdoggg said:

I approached her and said, "Debra, I’ve never done this before but I have to either lay you or Jack off.”

"Could you jack off for now?" she says. "I feel like shit. If you can wait, I'll do you at lunchtime."

Brilliant  :biggrin:  :drinks:

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Binman comes to a house with no bin. Sees a Chinese guy leaving the front door.

Binman: Hey mate, where's your bin?

Chinese guy: ...I bin Hong Kong.

Binman: No mate, where's your wheelie bin?

Chinese guy: ...No, I wrealy bin Hong Kong!!

 

 

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21 hours ago, bumblebee said:

Guess you are missing Thailand this Sunday morning BT :)

:biggrin:  :drinks:

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A London Irish friend used to take his family to Mayo every summer until his kids revolted, asking 'can't we go somewhere where it doesn't rain all the time?'! :character00292::biggrin:

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A cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates.

"Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asked.


"Well, I can think of one thing," the cowboy offered.  "On a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota, I came upon a   gang of bikers who were threatening a young woman.  I directed  them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen.  So, I approached  the largest and most tattooed biker and smacked him in the face, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the   ground.  I yelled, 'Now, back off or I'll kick the shit out of all of you!'"

St. Peter was impressed, "When did this happen?"

"Couple of minutes ago."


 

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I must admit I felt a little uneasy

When she bent down to tie the laces of my shoe

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