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Jokes Thread


duke007

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  • 2 weeks later...

Business was terrible and not picking up.  I had to fire somebody, and I narrowed it down to one of two people, Debra or Jack. It was an impossible decision because they were both super workers.

Rather than flip a coin, I decided I would fire the first one who used the water cooler the next morning.

Debra came in the next morning with a horrible hangover after partying all night.  She went to the cooler to take an aspirin.

I approached her and said, "Debra, I’ve never done this before but I have to either lay you or Jack off.”

"Could you jack off for now?" she says. "I feel like shit. If you can wait, I'll do you at lunchtime."

I had to let Jack go.

Bosses have to make the tough decisions!!

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2 hours ago, Pdoggg said:

I approached her and said, "Debra, I’ve never done this before but I have to either lay you or Jack off.”

"Could you jack off for now?" she says. "I feel like shit. If you can wait, I'll do you at lunchtime."

Brilliant  :biggrin:  :drinks:

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A cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates.

"Have you ever done anything of particular merit?" St. Peter asked.


"Well, I can think of one thing," the cowboy offered.  "On a trip to the Black Hills out in South Dakota, I came upon a   gang of bikers who were threatening a young woman.  I directed  them to leave her alone, but they wouldn't listen.  So, I approached  the largest and most tattooed biker and smacked him in the face, kicked his bike over, ripped out his nose ring, and threw it on the   ground.  I yelled, 'Now, back off or I'll kick the shit out of all of you!'"

St. Peter was impressed, "When did this happen?"

"Couple of minutes ago."


 

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